Hi ,
I'm writing form my 6-week vacation in Asia. I've been in three countries so far and I'm taking my parents to China in 2 weeks so they can see the Great Wall. I will hopefully write from there and share some pictures.
If your relationship is getting stagnant or feeling like it's stuck in a rut, getting away and creating
some space for you two to miss each other can do wonder for your relationship.
If you are wondering if he's ever going to marry you and the very thought will in time poison your relationship. So instead of feeling blues cause you feel that your relationship doesn't deepen fast enough or worse still nagging him or keep bringing the talk about what you want, taking "a break" from each other might be the solution.
My
boyfriend and I were so much in need for a break ourselves because we were just together too much. I work from home and he works 3 nights a week that allows him a lot of time being at home himself. We begin to get easily irked by each other for every little thing.
You see, familiarity breeds contempt. And sex begins to feel like a routine and nothing so surprising anymore, right? We just know what to expect from each other and
it's not so much an urgency anymore.
Heck, if we know he/she's gonna always be there what's the point of having sex tonight or tomorrow or the next day, right? It can always wait. It's no longer a priority simply because it can always wait. We're not going anywhere. We have the rest of our lives to have sex with each other. :D
So something has to change.
When two
people are with each other 24/7 it doesn't take much to feel it's too much: we need to miss each other.
So did I leave for my much needed me-time and I can't be happier that I took that step.
We are indeed missing each other! So bad that I want to rush back home. But no I can't cause I have a commitment to take my parents to China.
There is another thing you can do if taking a
trip isn't an option (I know I know not everyone is as lucky as I am but I can actually teach you how but I digress ;) ) when your relationship is stuck in a rut, i.e. understanding men's secret erogenous zone!
What is that, you might ask?
http://katarinaphang.com/language-of-desire
If I asked you to guess what his "secret" erogenous zone is, I bet you'd say his eyes. Or maybe his skin. Or maybe it's the little area down near the family jewels called the perineum that you may have heard about.
Those are great guesses. However the most secret erogenous zone on a man is his MIND. Yes. And I do mean the one in his skull...not the little one in his pants!
Does that surprise
you a little? It surprised me when I first figured this out!
It's a widely-held belief that it's women who get seduced by tapping into her imagination and emotions. And many people assume that men are built to just want sex at any time 24/7, there isn't a need to get "in the mood". So it comes as a surprise to many that men's minds are highly erogenous. Certainly men's sex drives and triggers are generally different than women's, but you can provide him a heightened sensual and
pleasurable experience by focusing some attention on his brain.
So, how do you do that exactly? Here are three easy ways:
1. Talk dirty to him
Dirty talk is one very effective way to arouse his mind. This can be a simple phrase like "I want you so badly right now" or something more explicit like describing what you want to do to him in detail. (FYI - the program Language of Desire gives you over 200+ dirty talk ideas). Whether you send this via text or whisper it in his ear,
hearing you express your desire for him activates his brain into a heightened state of arousal.
http://katarinaphang.com/language-of-desire
2. Appreciate him
Focus on the things you appreciate about him and tell him. Let him know how much you value that he makes you feel safe. Or how hard he works to support your family. Or
how you love that he can make you laugh. It's easy to forget to compliment our partner. When you give your man genuine appreciation, you feed his ego and self-esteem. And it increases the emotional connection he feels to you. Sure, this happens outside of the bedroom but you will see a direct result from it between the sheets. Because a man who feels appreciated also feels sexy.
http://katarinaphang.com/language-of-desire
3. Validate his sexual prowess
In a similar way, telling him how sexy you find him and how much he pleases you when it comes to sex activates one of the biggest triggers to his whole sex drive. Men are hard-wired to want to please a woman sexually. Validating his ability to make you feel good satisfies him probably more than you might recognize. Give him encouragement by expressing
your bliss during the act and definitely follow-up with a "this is what I loved best" highlight after. Just like you'd thank someone for treating you to a nice dinner, thank him for treating you to an amazing orgasm.
This is just a small example of the kind of information I share in Felicity Keith's program Language of Desire. There are over 20 lessons chock-full of insights on his sex drive, how to trigger potent neurochemicals, and step-by-step instructions on having him feel like he's
won the sexual lottery with you.
http://katarinaphang.com/language-of-desire
Love,
Katarina